Hearing Voices Again with Schizoaffective Disorder

I have schizoaffective disorder, and I’m hearing voices again for the first time in a long time. Due to medication, I didn’t hear them for what seemed like ages. But now they’re back. Here’s what it’s like to be hearing voices again with schizoaffective disorder.

Hearing Voices Again with Schizoaffective Disorder

The medication that eliminated the schizoaffective symptom of hearing voices was a mood stabilizer for my schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type.

I didn’t hear voices because of the increase in my mood stabilizer. When I got double knee replacement surgery last year, though, I started hearing schizoaffective voices again. This was because of the narcotic painkiller I needed. When I went off the painkiller, the voices were gone.

I’m not on a narcotic painkiller now, but for the past few days, I’ve had trouble with voices reappearing. It could be because I’m going off an as-needed anxiety medication. It could be because my mood stabilizer dosage needs to be adjusted. I don’t know. I will be talking with my psychiatric nurse practitioner about this.

Hearing Voices Again Isn't As Bad As It Used to Be

It’s important to note here that my recent voices, including the voices from the painkiller, are not anywhere near as bad as those I heard a few years ago. They’re not as disruptive or aggressive. They’re there, and I hear them, but they don’t change my mental state like they used to. I’m not in an otherworldly fog with voices shouting at me. They sound more like someone has the TV on in the other room. That’s it.

The old voices I heard due to schizoaffective disorder were loud, shouting insults at me. They were also very disorienting. I had to stop whatever I was doing and go home. If I was already home, I had to stop whatever I was doing and watch a soothing movie, like Tori Amos: Live from the Artists Den, a film about an intimate concert the pianist and singer/songwriter Tori Amos gave. I used to bring the movie on vacation in case I heard voices again.

But now, the schizoaffective voices I hear are just annoying. I’m more concerned about what it means that I’m hearing them than I am about the voices themselves. Am I stressed out? Do I need to get my mood stabilizer levels checked?

My voices these days are pretty chill, and I’m pretty chill about my voices. A good example of what usually happens with these new voices is that my husband, Tom, and I will be lying in bed playing with our phones, and I’ll ask him if he’s watching a video. He’ll say no, and I’ll think that I must be hearing voices again. But it’s not that big of a deal.

My therapist said to keep an eye on it for now, and if it’s still a problem in a week, I’ll contact my psychiatric nurse practitioner. But I haven’t heard them in two days, so maybe they’re going away. As I said, it’s not that big of a deal, and it sounds worse than it is.